Today is the first day of Rachael Harrie's Fourth Campaign! Stop by Rachael's blog for all the official rules. Here's the prompt for today:
Write a short story/flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words, “Shadows crept across the wall”. These five words will be included in the word count.
If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), do one or more of these:
- end the story with the words: "everything faded." (also included in the word count)
- include the word "orange" in the story
- write in the same genre you normally write
- make your story 200 words exactly!
Here's mine in 200 words exactly:
Shadows crept across the wall as my eyes shot open. Faint guttural sounds of the Durgan people echoed around me. Where am I? Damp musty air filled my lungs. I was in a cave. I tried to sit up but searing pain shot through my shoulder. I slumped back on the hard ground hoping to remember what happened but nothing came. It didnt' matter now. I was a captive of the barbaric Durgans. I had to find a way out.
A campfire's orange glow seeped around the large rock blocking the entrance. I crept to it and peered outside into the darkness. 15 Durgans slept around the fire. Others busied themselves with their weapons. Two guards approached. I hurried to where I'd been laying and pretended I was asleep. This was my chance. With ease the two hulking creatures pushed the stone aside and entered. Their primitive language was unintelligible but I knew they were fighting...over me. One leaned over me, his hot breath caustic against my neck. The other pulled him away angrily. Before they could react I bolted into the night. I ran through the forest until I couldn't breathe. I lay down hidden from view and everything faded.
Hope you enjoyed it. Vote for me if you liked it! I'm # 30. Check out all the other great entries here
And if you love writing flash fiction check this out.
Kathy
A great many mystery elements in this entry. I like it. Kept me on my toes throughout. Nice one! :)
ReplyDeleteYikes, I'm glad she escaped! Great writing!!
ReplyDeleteLooooved the classic fantasy vibe here. Really great work! (Annnnd new follower... so glad to be connected!!)
ReplyDeletesuspenseful! wonder what they look like!
ReplyDeletenice job =)
Great entry - I admire people who can world build so well.
ReplyDeletePhew! Narrow escape! :) Great job!
ReplyDeleteGood job- it reminded me of when Merry and Pippin are caught by the Orcs in LOTR.
ReplyDeleteLots of tension! Great story!
ReplyDeleteOK, first off.. who are the durgans, and where can I read more about them? :) Really liked it. +1 follower.
ReplyDelete"Durgan" is a great word! I'm rubbish at coming up with new, good words.
ReplyDelete(I'm #60.)
Creepy Durgans! I'm glad she got away!
ReplyDeleteGreat story!!
ReplyDeleteWow! I wish I knew what happened next!
ReplyDeleteGood suspense, nice ending. Seems like it would make a great scene for a longer story, if you were so inclined. :)
ReplyDeleteDurgan really conveys how barbaric they seem. Great story!
ReplyDeleteYou have nice imagery and execution here, very suspenseful for 200 words. Great job!
ReplyDeleteI like the Durgans and want to totally read on... Great job!
ReplyDeleteI love it...I want to know more about the nasty Durgans. Good job!
ReplyDeleteMichelle
www.michelle-pickett.com/blog
#106
The Durgans sound like neanderthals/cave men. Good thing she could run faster and was smarter than them! Great job:)
ReplyDeleteshe escapted did she - good for her
ReplyDeleteI'm #103
Interesting world you created. I find it fascinating how everyone assumed the character was a female and had to read it again but there was no reference other than the Durgans fighting over her/him. LOL, maybe it is late and after reading so many entrys I am missing something. Anyways, I enjoyed this.
ReplyDeleteYes she is a female, but you're right I didn't actually say that anywhere. Good call! :)
DeleteI could feel the dampness in the cave. Frightening.
ReplyDeleteAhh, finally someone escaped! Mine is #71
ReplyDeleteOh, so claustrophobic! Definitely felt like I was there - great job!
ReplyDeleteInteresting! Nice job.
ReplyDeleteI imagine them as looking like giant ogres :-)
ReplyDeleteFun entry! The Durgans sound frightening and gross! :)
ReplyDeleteGreat entry! Very interesting. Where did the Durgans come from? Glad she escaped. Was she on their planet or were the Durgans some freak of nature on her planet? (scary thought)
ReplyDeleteGreat flash fiction. I'm glad I found you from the campaign!
ReplyDeleteGreat job, I liked it!
ReplyDeleteLove the fantasy element of the story. Great ending.
ReplyDeleteHey there! I'm finally making the rounds and getting to other campaigners' blogs.
ReplyDeleteI really liked your scene. It's got action, suspense and fantasy! All things I love! Nice work.
You set up the situation seamlessly and I could feel the peril throughout. Lucky escape, I wonder what they were going to do to him/her!
ReplyDeleteI like how you kept the suspense. From my read, I'm interpreting the protagonist to be female. And if so, I just wanted you to know I love strong heroines who can get themselves out of tight situations. I hope to read more and am "following" you now. =)
ReplyDeleteHi fellow campaigner - you've just been tagged :-)
ReplyDeleteGreat story!! These Durgans sound scary.
ReplyDeleteGreat job with this!! :)
ReplyDeletewhat did you mean by "chosen to move on to the second round!" that you left on my blog?
ReplyDeleteDurgans, where do they come from? They seem quite nasty. I am glad she got away!
ReplyDelete