Okay I don't know how March snuck up on me so quickly! February seemed to move like a snail and all of a sudden it's March 2nd and it's the first Wednesday of March which means it's time for another Insecure Writer's Support Group post! The IWSG was founded by Alex J. Cavanaugh as a place where we can share our fears and successes with a supportive environment. The IWSG is a wonderful community to meet other authors, hear their struggles, give and receive encouragement and friendship and it has been named one of Writer's Digest top 101 sites for writers!!
Come join us!
Thank you to this month's co-hosts: Janet Alcorn, Pat Garcia,Natalie Aguirre, and Shannon Lawrence! Please go visit them!
The optional question for March is: Have you ever been conflicted about writing a story or adding a scene to a story? How did you decide to write it or not?
Yes, I have. When writing my nonfiction/memoir book
One Year on Broadway which just released last August, I was conflicted about writing the chapter detailing my parents' anger and refusal to allow me to date my husband because he was half Japanese. There were some pretty horrible things said to both of us. One night in particular they threatened my husband with harm if he ever saw me again.
Of course my husband and I have been married now for over 27 years. My parents apologized before our wedding and deeply regretted their actions. They have been wonderful to us ever since.
Writing the first draft, I put everything in, all those pent up feelings that I thought I had let go a long time ago came out in a very vivid, emotional scene. But I knew that I couldn't publish that. Those shouted words that had been burned into my brain that night so long ago, now written on a page would have hurt my parents as much as they did us when they were first said. That was never my intention for writing our story. Their words spoken in fear and anger did not define who they really were.
I wanted our story to be more about the forgiveness and the capacity to love deeply even when hurt by someone.
So I rewrote the pivotal scene to be more like a series of sharp photographic flashbacks instead of full narrative. This way, I could get the point across of what occurred and still protect my aging parents. They had only been trying to protect me.
Sadly, my father passed only a few months before it was published, but my mom read it and I'm happy to report that she loved it so much that she has recommended it to all her friends and our relatives!
Also don't forget to stop by April 6th for my interview with
Alex J Cavanaugh about his upcoming release CassaDark!!!
Hurry and pre-order your copy to today and make sure to add to your Goodreads To Read shelf!!
Here are all the links!
iTunes – https://books.apple.com/us/book/x/id1574189874
Amazon – https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0982FL3SH
Barnes & Noble – https://www.barnesandnoble.com/s/2940164947033
Kobo – https://store.kobobooks.com/en-us/Search?Query=9781939844859
Scribed – https://www.scribd.com/search?query=9781939844859&language=0
Hope you all have a wonderful March!!
Love,
Kathy
That's awesome they admitted they were wrong and that your mother loved the story. Twenty-seven years - you're doing it right.
ReplyDeleteLooking forward to April 6!
I was pretty nervous about her reading it!
DeleteThanks Alex!
Looking forward to April 6th as well! :)
A few other people who wrote a memoir mentioned the difficulty of writing about people you know. Sorry about your parents' reaction to your husband. My parents were not kind to my husband, who is Mexican-American for about six years when we first got together. My dad apologized publically at our wedding. I just had to let it go.
ReplyDeleteLearning to let go is hard, but I agree it is so important.
DeleteYou used the first draft as therapy, which is good - that probably made it easier to soften it all.
ReplyDeleteThank you for featuring Alex and his book next month.
Yes I did, and it made a huge difference!
DeleteYou're welcome! I'm happy to help Alex out!!
I very glad your parents got through that. Prejudice is often taught early and those are difficult emotions to get past. Good for them for growing and learning!
ReplyDeleteSounds like you took the best route for you and your story!!
Thanks Jemi.
DeletePutting it down in your first draft probably was so therapeutic! I'm glad you were able to work through that!
ReplyDeleteThanks Nicole, yes it was extremely therapeutic!
DeleteYou took the best approach for you and your story--that's the most important thing.
ReplyDeleteThanks for featuring Alex's book. I look forward to reading it.
Thanks for stopping by!
DeleteSo happy to help Alex out. He has given us all so much!
Sounds like you found a great way to convey the pain of that long-ago time without hurting your parents--kudos! I'm not sure I could ever write a memoir because, 1) my life is *boring* and 2) sharing the few interesting parts might get me sued. I'll stick to fiction :-)
ReplyDeleteLOL! SO funny, I had to do a lot of soul searching before I decided to actually go through with publishing it. Thanks for stopping by!
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